Oh...you want to PRETEND you're a football player

So, my son is not exactly a group activities kind of kid. Especially if those group activities have established rules that are not adjustable on the fly.

I learned this when he was three and taking Jumps, Giggles, and Wiggles. He didn't really care to march to the beat of Raffi, he preferred to look at himself in the mirror and blow puffer fish faces. We decided to try a more sport type activity when he was four, and we enrolled in a parent-and-kid soccer class. He spent most of the time laying on the ground whining. The summer he was five, we thought we'd try t-ball. Daddy was the assistant coach for the team. Luckily, there weren't any serious kids or parents on the team. (T-ball for small kids is BRUTAL...too much standing around time...not enough action to keep their little minds from wandering.)
Last fall he wanted to try football (flag, not tackle). It was the most painful experience thus far. There's so much to remember, and so many rules...and it was the first experience he had with team competition. He didn't enjoy it. Neither did we (especially dad who was again coaching).

Around Christmas time, he asked if he was going to get to play football again. Given his lack of enthusiasm for team sports, we were surprised, but we figured we ought to encourage where we can. We signed him up again...we were late, so we had to pay extra money, but it's worth it, right? He asked to do it. That means he must really want to play football.

After several weeks of twice-a-week practice and games on Saturdays (our season record is rivaling the Detroit Lions for you NFL fans)...after tirades and tears from everyone in the family (dad is coaching again...don't ask why)...after countless hours of wondering what were we thinking, I had an epiphany...our son does not want to PLAY football....he wants to PRETEND he's a football player. With two games and two practices left, we are on end-of-the-season countdown.

We're moving on to golf next. I'm digging deep into my cobwebbed recesses of optimism and trying to remain hopeful that this might be the thing that will click.

If not, I think I'll find a nice drama program.